Its been awhile since I post anything here. It was abandoned for half a year I think. And I fucking miss this. I miss how often I always write. This is what my life have been. I don't know how to communicate with other people and I think its pathetic of me to tell my life problems with other people. This is where no one can judge or say anything. I may not get any response but at least some of the burden was lifted whenever I wrote any post here regarding my life. I didn't have time before this. I was busy with assignments and such.
Its sad ya know, my life that is. Sometimes when good things happens, I manage to destroy it. No matter what they say, they always end up leaving me. It hurts. I guess that my fault then, since nobody really stayed. I'm getting use to it. And I kind of expected it. When people say they'll be with me for a long time...I just huffed and just watch how long will they truly be with me.
Words are powerful. They can convince you, tell you stuff you want to hear and also hurt you at the same time. That is why I hate conversation. I prefer to sit here and write anything I want. Cause its mine and mine alone. Theres no judgeful person, theres no critics or even intervention. Just me writing what ever hell I want. And it feels so damn good.
Its been awhile and I've been crazy for awhile. I hate how I am right now. I'm being too fake. Too wanting to fit in. I don't like it but I can't help but to feel lonely sometimes and that made me feel like shit. When I've finally have a friend that I trust, they decided to be far away from me. Yatt is in Australia now while Fateen is here but not here. Ya know what I mean? She's in KL while I'm in JB. Yeah, we could meet up and such but our situations just doesn't allow us too. Hmm.
I wonder, till how long am I gonna be like this. When will I be able to change this life I'm living. When will my life gets better. I'll end up being a very dark person if this continues. I'm already a dark persona now. They'll increase I'm sure. Hahaha.
